Overwhelmed

A couple of weeks I posted the above photo to my Instagram, expressing my exhaustion and appreciation, and promptly removed it about 10 minutes later. It had received a few comments to the effect of "I wish my inbox looked like that!!" Which made me feel like a jerk, so I took it down.

I've been blessed with a relatively successful business selling my art prints on Etsy. I am grateful and thankful for every order. I know that the above image is many Etsy shop owners DREAMS. I don't want to sound ungrateful at all. But the thing is, guys...sometimes this is hard. Especially around the holidays. Don't get me wrong, it's a great 'problem' to have, but it can also be exhausting and make you feel like you aren't living your life.

I don't have time to eat healthy meals, I don't have time to work out, I barely have time to shower. I start to get really down on myself and feel like a total slob. I turn down offers to go do something with friends because I need to use that time to work on orders. Or, I get snippy when my husband asks me to go do something and I don't want to because I feel like I need to use that time to work on orders. I start to feel like I'm losing myself and my life. 

And then I feel guilty.

How DARE I feel anything but happy and grateful every second of every day?! This is an amazing gift. This has allowed me to pay off long standing bills and buy a home with my husband. This is everything I ever dreamed of from the DAY I started my shop. But not every day is all rainbows and sunshine. 

You may have noticed I was absent last week. I hit a wall. I couldn't spare the extra few minutes to make a blog post, and I didn't want to do anything half assed or thrown together. So I took a break.

I'm making an effort to make time for my life, the things I enjoy to do. M and I are going to try to start doing team trivia once a week at the bar down the street. Hopefully taking at least one night a week to allow for a break will help.

I like to keep this a positive space, but I want to thank you for allowing me to also vent here. And I want to invite you to share any overwhelming feelings you may be going through, whether it be juggling commitments with life or ANYTHING else. We're all struggling with one thing or another at any given moment.

So please keep this in mind when you support handmade businesses this holiday season: the seller you are buying from is only human. They want to make you happy. Things happen that is out of their control. They can only work so many hours a day. Please be kind.

Thank you for understanding, from the bottom of my heart.